Adolescence

Some thoughts by Magdalena Liem

Adolescence is generally viewed as a transitional stage between childhood and adulthood, where the adolescent has to face developmental changes, such as biological, psychological, cognitive, emotional, social, moral and spiritual changes.

At the same time, adolescence is also seen as a troubled period, where they become rebellious and more inclined to mood swings, e.g. becoming more emotional and less friendly. During this transition period, parents often expect their adolescents to become more difficult to relate to, which increase the conflict between parent/caregiver and the adolescent. Adolescence can be a confusing period, during which they are searching and striving to form their identity. This journey is therefore a very important time of life in determining their future.

Understanding the Stages of Adolescence

Adolescence is a period between 12-18 years of age, which consists of three stages. Early adolescence is when they experience physiological changes. In mid-adolescence, they will continue physical and sexual development and start moving away from parental influence, building friendships with others and thus more likely to adopt peer norms and values. In late adolescence, they will feel more comfortable with their ‘new’ body and want to become more independent, as they move to adulthood.

How can parent-adolescent conflicts happen?

The conflicts between parents and their adolescents are often based on different perceptions of developmental expectations, and time in achieving some developmental tasks. Research has shown that more conflict occurs in families where parents perceive their adolescents to be negative, e.g. unhappy, unkind, anxious, etc. Many good kids can turn for the worst during the adolescent years, which contribute even more conflict between parents and their adolescents. Sometimes adolescents can develop to become violent towards their parents and siblings.

What is counselling’s role in restoring parent-adolescent relationship?

The broken parent-adolescent relationship can be restored. However, it takes two parties, the parents and the adolescents, to work together in resolving their conflict, and building a better and healthier relationship. 

There are three counselling approaches in working with parent-adolescent relationships:

• Individual therapy for parents
• Individual therapy for adolescents
• Family therapy, where parents and adolescents attend counselling together

Counselling can help you in:

• Exploring reasons why “good kids go bad”
• Exploring the cause of the conflicts
• Understanding the adolescent’s violence
• Understanding parent and adolescent expectations
• Learning to stop the bad things continuing
• Learning to stop adolescent violence
• Repairing the damage
• Creating a better home environment
• Building respect and trust
• Setting clearer boundaries and responsibilities
• Building better relationships

Ring Bridges Counselling if you wish to discuss how we may be able to help you.

Enquiries: 0415 752 544

Ring us and you will be recommended a choice of counsellors qualified and experienced for your situation.

Email: info@BridgesCounselling.com.au

Bridges Counselling Parramatta is a team of professional counsellors and psychologists, specialising in marriage, family and individual counselling.